10/20/2021

Dear Diary,

I have no idea how to do any of this. All my skills seem to be useless and my way of doing things seem to be pissing my peers off. Can my degree in Imagination really be of any help? Will my magic potions scare people away? And, most important of all, how can transfer all this intangible money that lives in my head into my very tangible bank account?

I know there is a Magic Wand out there waiting for me to pick it up and waive it.

3/14/2022

Oh Dear Diary,

I have been given a book. 

A Magic Spell Book called “The Millionaire Real Estate Agent”. It seems it’s trying to tell me something so I will follow my instinct and keep going deeper into it.

There are moments, dearest diary, that I must confess I feel lost in my mind. It feels like that to me at least. What do I have to do with real estate? When did that become my business? And where do I go from here?

8/22/2023

1/5/2024

Dear Diary, my biggest nightmare has come true. I AM… dying. Is this how it starts?

If only I could see myself clearly… Without anybody else's opinions or ideas… I wanna see myself, know myself for who I truly am. What if I hate her… What if she’s nothing but a wretched creature with no possible salvation? What if I find a monster looking back at me? What if this is the best it can get? I suppose it would be easiest to keep living in a box of my own ignorance, while blaming everyone else for it.

Things to Focus on this month:

1. Look at your face in the mirror every day,

2. Praying will save your life

3. Stay away from small minded people and dream killers

16/6/2024

Dear Diary,

Find myself?  Find myself? I don’t need to “find” myself. I know who I am. And I know who I am NOT.  I am NOT a real estate agent. I am NOT someone that wears a fanny pack and drives a Ford Escape. I am NOT some inconsequential blip in the history of the world, some nobody living their life on survival mode, leeching and mooching off of other people’s success. I am NOT a nobody whose closet consists of 5 pairs of lived-in sweatpants, shirts with permanent sweat stains on and period underwear. And I certainly am NOT someone who would use store brand shampoo. I am embarrassed for whomever this individual is, who I am having to, most unfortunately,  cross paths with, for some cosmic joke which frankly is completely lost on me. I AM REGINA ASTRIS, the artist. The author. The acclaimed Star.  My face is on magazine covers far and wide. And let me tell you: People know who I AM.

21/9/2024

Dear Diary, Dear Diary,

I saw all the things that I loved in this world. The Photos and poems and the collages and the drawings. All my scribbles and ideas. I wanted to do it all over. To write, to act, to sing and dance like I used to. Without worries…You are born knowing what you are supposed to do. Then everyone tries to tell you’re wrong, for decades. For decades they say no to your ideas, they laugh and scorn at you. They come with reason and facts and bills and responsibilities. If you’re lucky, if you’re really lucky you’ll stop listening at some point. And when you do, when you truly stop listening to them and remember who you are and what you're supposed to be doing.. You realize you are running out time…

I looked in the mirror and barely recognized my reflection. I looked right at her and said, what the hell are you looking at?

Why am I here, pacing, sobbing, grasping at straws. Trying to figure out what I don’t want to be . . . when all I want is out there, waiting for me the minute I say “I know who I AM”.

Things to Focus on this month:

1. Believe in Yourself

2. Believe in Yourself

3. Believe in Yourself

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21/12/2024

Diary,

On the outside it seemed I was in a weakened position. Crazy was on everyone’s lips. I have been called worse things. For a really long time I’ve allowed outside voices to hurt me. To make me cry, doubt, quit. 

Inside I’ve been building a fortress. My mind is clearer than ever. Emptier than ever. Waves come and go but they cannot penetrate, they cannot dilute, they cannot destroy the house that was built on a rock. I have no idea what’s coming next but I know it will be quiet. And deep. And warm like a ray of sun piercing through my heart.

I want nothing…

That is the beginning of Everything. To want is to deny my own existence. To want means you do not have. You are lacking or missing. WANT NOTHING AND YOU’LL HAVE IT ALL.

1/3/2025

Dear Diary,

I don’t know what the hell I was workin’ for, sitting in my apartment—all alone. And I think of the rent she was paying. And it’s crazy. It seemed like I had what everyone else wanted. My apartment, a car, beauty, brains and plenty of men at my feet, but still, goddamnit, I was lonely. 

I realized that those things don’t mean anything. Sometimes the best thing to do is walk away. Walk away from it all. When you can’t walk away, that's when it gets tough. That’s when they own you.

5/28/2025

Dear diary, we MADE it!

I was born to be a movie star, baby. That’s really what I came here to do. Selling was the greatest career a woman could want. Just me riding on a smile and a shoeshine… A salesman only needs one thing: a Dream. And I have plenty.

I Puts on red lipstick. A red blazer. And my MREA book…

The woman that makes a splash in the business world, the woman who creates a personal interest, that’s the woman who gets ahead. The woman who understands that the only thing you have in this world is what you can sell.

My name is Regina and I am a Saleswoman.

Thank you notes from the writer,

The following advice is intended for mature audiences. The purpose of this newsletter is to inform and entertain. Follow advice at your own risk.

My name is Filipa and I am a Rochester based Actor, writer and producer. Thank you for reading!

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